On Preventing It
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1. Look at your weekly activities. Do you like what you're doing? If you don't like it, will it benefit you in the long run? I mean, if you're playing piano and it's not the highlight of your week... but you have a long-term goal of becoming a good pianist... then stick with piano. But if you're attending the weekly political discussion group that annoys the heck out of you, why go?
2. Have a no-tell policy when it comes to Drama.
3. Don't lie to your friends. This is tough, because truth is hard. But in the long run, you're preventing stress.
4. Plan on sleep time.
5. Christina Katz (The Writer Mama,
www.thewritermama.wordpress.com) says she takes a day off once a month, just to read. You can't take off school, but give yourself at least one day on the weekend per month to chill.
6. Buy a fabulous, beyond-belief cool zany planner agenda with lots of room in it.
7. Learn how to use your cell calendar.
8. Eat breakfast, eat healthy. Don't feel bad about what you're eating, just eat better.
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On Dealing with It: Action
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1. Breathe. It's okay. Grades? Boyfriend? Friends? Parents?
2. Put this into focus. If your parents are getting divorced, this is huge and realize that it is huge- no pretending. If this is your BFF in a tiff because you didn't compliment her hairband, this is not huge.
3. Write a list of what you can do this second.
a. Grades: What's your next assignment in the class? When does the teacher stop by for extra help? Where can you find a good tutor? How can you catch up? Ask for extra credit assignments.
b. Friends (emotional/social): What's at the heart of this? Is it a recurring problem? What are the consequences? What are possible solutions? Who will give you good advice about this issue?
c. Friends and Relatives (physical/health): What are the practical effects of having someone in the hospital? Make sure you know your own commitments: where do you have to be? Call your best friend or a parent-like adult and cry. It's okay. Talk to teachers if you need extensions because of this. Write in your journal.
d. Relatives (Parents): Why are you fighting? Call a close, older friend and ask her for her opinion. Write out your complaints: know what you think is wrong. Talk to your guidance counselor. Talk to your parent, with a cool head.
e. ANY intimidation, harassment or bullying: Who is hurting you? Who can stop this from happening? Talk immediately to a parent, counselor or older, trusted friend: do not let this continue. One-timers turn into habits.
4. Think in resolutions. Baby steps, girl, baby steps.
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On Dealing With It: Recovery and Care
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1. Eat dark chocolate.
2. Take baths every night. Or, to be more environmentally friendly, a 1-minute hot shower.
3. Do something that makes you laugh, that you're not graded for, that lets you be creative.
4. Exercise. Take long walks while it's light out, with no iPod.
5. Listen to Frank Sinatra.
6. Know that you will be all right.
7. Breathe